Didn't sleep very well last night which is a bugger. Woke up quite awake but I suppose on the upside, I woke to a beautiful day with sunshine streaming into the apartment - which was quite good.

First thing I noticed was that I was still stiff from exercise two days ago - all because I didn't rest enough for my body to recover. Sleep really is important. I Hit the fridge at what must seemed like 2am for juice and then I rather unwieldily wondered back to bed. Actually, an interesting recollection now is how hazy that felt like - was like walking underwater. You know, I'd not be surprised if I got to the fridge, opened it, reached for the carton of Apple juice, brought it to the counter, fondled for a glass, then drink it from the carton before feeling my way back to the fridge, putting it back - and then heading back to my bed ...as if nothing happened! Ridiculous.

Im also a victim of watching day 1 of the Masters at the Augusta course in - somewhere in America - until late. That's a but strange but I suppose I dint really watch Golf so it was nice to see one of the most famous events in the golf calendar live.

So ok I'm now on the tube, sorta-not-so-tired right now but I imagine come around 3pm today and I'll be all wrapped up like a cat, sleeping under my desk :-)

Thinking of getting my broadband sorted out but funny how it's not really caused a real issue for me. If anything it's prevented me from working from home - in the evenings and restricts my working day to 9:30 through until 18:00 so that's kinda good and I'm enjoying the distinction. Previously I've found myself a bit inclined to never really finish work... I feel like a patient just thinking about it - Broadband is my enabler! Not really. But sorta.

I love the way that after a long journey on the tube - the city awaits me with it's beautiful architecture, sunshine glaring of the glass sky scrapers that tower above me and I'll again realise how wonderful life is.

Hey just thinking - it's going to be a pretty great day!

Been having some good runs in the last two weeks. Im not your traditional runner and thus I've not a natural running action or posture. Generally running has not been my strong point however combining that with my need to build a strong and healthy body, I've become more prone to running and as I've been running to gym instead of running at gym - I've found the whole outdoor experience as important for mr as the gym itself. Because I'm running more regularly, the runs seem easier as I don't get tired at the same points in the journey as say I did before.

It's quite groovy because it's a physical indication that I'm adapting to running. This is great because it shows I'm changing and improving.

I think Rhythm and consistency are huge enablers and allow your body to adapt as it's easier to cope with consistency than it is to cope with constant change.

With all that said, I find that eating has become a silent focus of mine. I eat only a few things but I like to know that what I eat is beneficial. I have breakfast in the mornings now which is a change - probably influenced by the fact that I own my time and space absolutely and can do or decide to do at my own pace which is great. Thinking now, living on my own has probably allowed me to concentrate and focus on my health more so I think than ever before. Also, psychologically I think it has contributed to my state of mind, which is positive and I dependant.

I got home the other day and I realised how happy I am as an individual, how appreciative I am of life and living and how wonderful our right to feel freedom is.

This, my running and gym activities coupled with my job, my preffered career and constant self learning really motivate me and that's great.

Man, I'm late. I watched Louis Theroux last night past the zero and as a result - I'm pretty famously late for work. It's pretty amazing how we cut steps when we are late. For instance, i don't have breakfast, I were that shirt that doesn't really go (but it's a shirt) and I don't really care about which way your hair is pointing or if it's pointing at all! I grab two socks - if they are mostly the same(there is no time!) - that's good enough. I leave the ironing board - it's out of place when I leave - but looking back, it seems to represent a kind of calmness in the room. Shoes flew on, wallet, keys, earphones all in one movement.

So that's how late leaves me. Pretty essential. And you wonder if essential based on this time constraint makes you more efficient - you pick only that which is nessesary? Compare that to doing planning, pacing oneself - goes this smack of inefficiency? Can we use tests like these to produce models that can help us prioritize in a situation where careful consideration is nor possible but which the outcome is essentially useful?

Anyway.

I love it, its raining. I love the sunshine but for a strange unfathomed reason the rain I kind of like the most - funny enough I watched a documentary about experimental psychology where one of the mechanisms discovered was that you could learn and associate fear with objects and that the remedy was to expose yourself to those fears routinely enough to get used to them until the fear is on average dulled due to regular exposure, and ultimately becomes manageable that it appears not to be an obvious issue. On a very simplified parellel ,it may be that I have conditioned myself to enjoy and like what I cannot rid myself of - Rain.

When you deconstruct your behaviour and perhaps adaptions like this, it seems quite hollow abd revealing however, the mind and Human behaviour is quite tremendous machine - human prevalence on Earth is testimony to this. We are capable of this.

The interesting thing is, I think really that I do quite enjoy the rain anyway, might be due to the above psychological adaptions or generally affinity with rain(how strange?) which is a benefit because I don't feel negative about it - I prefer being positive as much I can hope for and there is usually a lot of rain.

The end. (He gets the girl and lives hapily ever after)