I went into London today. Just so I could read a recently anticipated chapter of my book(I'd only started yearning to read this particular chapter of this particular book).

Sometimes I like being hidden in public. Especially if I get lost myself. I didn't particularly get lost this time as I couldn't help but overhear the two ladies on the chairs adjacent to me divulge much of their love lives which was heavily focused on the d-day "this is it, I'm running out of time panic and not getting any younger" drama scenario. Which by the time I had, ploughed excruciatingly slowly through the marshes of my chapter, included the elaborate evaluation of various men and their lives, their character traits followed rather serious discussions about sperm donation, jealousy, the one woman's fidgeting child, "Alex" and marriage.

After which, the insights I had gained were horrifying, truly. I shouldn't have been listening but I can't turn of my ears like I can my eyes. Around that time of just finished my chapter as planned, I decided that I'd go for a meander. The study, strategy and evaluation of men, marriage and life became somewhat overwhelming. So I did.

I went over the hungerford bridge where the overhead lines radiate downwards and the cold water wind froze my neck and hands. And this is not the coldest yet. Apparently the worst is yet to come and winter is going to be, well cold. I am utterly astounded. I decided to loop around Trafalgar Square and find my way back past Embankment. That didn't quite go according to plan either. I found myself in the same predicament that I usual do when exploring London: I find myself lost in familiar places. I ended up near Leicster square but still don't,for the life of me, know how Trafalgar Square, Embankment or Leicster Square join. Less so how I got from one to the other! I got fairly fatigued and I found myself both hungry and not at home. Two things that I'd recently decided where quite important.

I bought a tuna sandwich and started on my way back home. I bought a DVD on the way and watched it. It was called "The invasion" and it was interesting. Kinda like "The invasion of the body snatchers" which I can't remember if I've seen or not. Was considering the Two Star War trilogies but at £14 a pop, I thought better of it. 

I had a dream last night. I dreamt that I saw Andie McDowell on the street. 

We had this classic intro: I walked past her and as I did her eyes looked up and were fixed on mine as we past - kinda like when you see someone you recognise but don't quite know who it is so you stare a little longer than usual. I'm a real romantic. Anyway, the next part of my dream is a little tricky to explain. I said to her that she needed to wait here while I went up the street as my dad had just driven past in a long oil tanker.

Then I was in a yellow taxi cab in the passenger seat while Andie and another woman(who we both knew) were both sitting in the back seat and she's(McDowell) not impressed with me and I'm leaning back over the seat talking to her trying to reason with her. Then I woke up. That's it.

They say you should write down what happens in your dreams. That's why they say keep a pencil and notepad on your bedside table. Or was that because of something else? Anyway, I only wish things had gone that much better with me and McDowell really.

I guess my subconscious could see that this wasn't going anywhere and broke it off before things could go from bad to worse, because let's face it, that's were it was going. Actually, now that I think about it, I think I pinched her on the knee or something and that didn't work out either because she slapped me. I've never been slapped in my dreams by a woman before, actually ever. That's probably when I woke up. That was my dream que to get out!

Well there you have it: my one time fling with Andie McDowell was well, in my dreams... probably where it belongs.

So I have been waking up real early for the last two days. It's been interesting. Firstly, there is the calm, which I can only describe as the peace of absence. My morning is not rushed and it's kind of zen really. The office is quite, feels like a place I meditation with the gentle peaceful hum of the machines almost as if they were dreaming of electronic ambitions.
It's starting to get dark, cold and rainy and we're in daylight saving time until next month, so there is a marked change about the world around me. I like change. It kinda reminds me that while things can change around me, essentially certain things about yourself don't change with the seasons. For instance, I still run, only is darker, wetter an more cold. It feels different but essentially it's the same. I've always gone running. How I feel about my goals don't change either. It's remarkable how change can most times, registers that opportunistic moment, where a new decision can be made. Sort of like "well, I might as well do this now, as this change seems a good a time to do it as any". Thing is, while changing is often in response to Changes, it's can also serve to reiterate why you decide at that point, instead not to change. For example, say it's getting really wet outside and when you run say your feet get really soggy, wet an uncomfortable after runs. It's possible to stop, due to the changes in the seasons. You have more opportunity to stop running because if this experience happening to you now than if it wasn't regularly raining while you run. The thing is, you actually love running, stopping would be stopping what you love, but having soggy feet is worse. So you stop running and don't get soggy feet. The thing is you took the opportunity to stop and you stopped. That how easy change can make you change. The alternative would be to have waterproof socks and continue running. And you love running. Taking that opportunity to change and not changing is buying waterproof socks and going running. Sometimes I wonder why we don't see the alternative as often. The reason simply is, stopping is more appealing so we don't invest in continuing without change. Maybe we don't invest in our interests long enough, maybe we have short attention spans or maybe we just don't think our goals are worth perusing anymore. If anything, change that. The belief in ones goals should be able to withstand the persuasion change all around us.
That said, there is the other side if the story, but that's the other side...and I haven't got much I'd like much to say about it.