I've just come back from a 21km run and it was fantastic and I'm just going to reflect on what worked and how it went to perhaps explore why.

I headed out just after half-past one in a long sleeve top. It was pretty cold outside. The original goal was to run 5km up the hill and onwards a little bit before turning around.

I've been thinking on a couple of my last runs that I should probably slow down a bit more and try to maintain a consistent, albeit slower pace throughout my run. This analysis was done on the back of the last couple of 10Km runs I'd done where I'd noticed that I've got a tendency to speed up in in beginning and also at the end of the run. 

The net effect of this is that I think I tend to strain in the end when perhaps I could just coast over the finish line.

So with that in mind, I've decided to head out a bit slower and try to keep it calm, cool and collected and I think this is what ultimately made this particular run so easy.

I didn't push forward, I just pulled back when I was moving a bit fast or when I was establishing a stitch and then I'd just 'canter'. This means that I was able to notice a lot of things about my running behaviour.

For example, I slowed down and my feet where not being banged up and usually after an 11Km run they are pretty torn up with impact shock and sometimes blisters. I still think that this is partly to do with the rate I'm running at and perhaps coupled with my weight - I'm gaining weight.

Either way that combination is not great, so slowing down has fixed the 'thunder' in my feet that I've been having lately.  

Slowing down has allowed me to concentrate on listening to the pain, and adjusting. Usually, I ignore pain when I run 'fast' around say 4"30 or so. Its almost like you're focusing so much on pace, that you don't care about what your feet are feeling like or going through.

So with this slower style, I could find a pace that did not mash up my feet. This I think, is also a large reason why running past the usual threshold of 10-11Km was so easy and why I was not even aware of any discomfort.  What I was aware of was a distinct lack of discomfort in my feet, and perhaps I should just see how far they would take me. 

So the shoes are not the problem (i never thought they were, as I've been using them for years, at least this particular model). The other thing that might have played a part in it, was that I was listening to my favourite songs of the year. That helped. 

From a psychological point of view, I was not hard on myself because I'd already said to myself at the start of the run that I was going to go slower.

In the uphill stages or the more treacherous terrain where I could have struggled, I just said to myself 'calm down, you're running slower now so if you need to run any slower that's fine' and this approach worked.

Being ok with slowing down and perhaps speeding up is ok. Going one speed or the speed you predicted you should go at, takes it's toll, particularly psychologically to maintain and also physically and I think corroborating the feeling in your arms, legs, arms with appropriate adjustments, including the pace, makes the run smoother - this is a breakthrough really.

Running should not be turmoil or an obstacle. 

I was wary about wearing long sleeves though. I've got a good track record of enjoying running in short sleeves and this is because ultimately I warm up sufficiently, so I've resisted the need to change. And I think this is what is important, being ok to adapt, even below expectations, is what made this run better than all others this year - and certainly x2 as long as usual. 

The route took me back to my old workplace, around it and all the way back again. It was nice to be in familiar surroundings and I felt fine.

Look, I'd be lying if I said that I did feel uncomfortable at times, especially as the clocked ticked on over the hour mark, but I just slowed down and kept it in gear, steady and calm and ultimately this avoided disaster.

Looking back at the stats, in the end, 4"59 pace is mighty impressive because I did not think I'd be reaching anywhere near that. if anything I thought perhaps at my pace I would be trundling on at around 6 minutes per km. That shows that it wasn't that slow, and I was just running at where I was most comfortable at and that is variable throughout the route. 

I never look at my watch routinely when running.

I've always found that this helps to reduce the stress and strain on accommodating expectations - I think it also messed with your stride.

I don't think we should have expectations about who long we take, we should perhaps have expectations about how long we'll run for and then manage all the factors in the run to make it happen - if that means stopping, slowing down, taking a picture or taking a pee whatever - do it and then carry on running.

As it happens I needed a leak at about 16km in, so I pulled over into a footpath that was abandoned (I had a good nose about to ensure I'd not be interrupted).

This is the first time I've needed to take a whizz mid-run, but I stopped. I rationalize with myself, that it would be uncomfortable not to, and why stop this zen-like run by having to worry about that.

When it comes to my preparation in terms of what I ate - nothing special: I just had my usual porridge and a cup of decaf coffee.

I did, however, sleep until 12 pm. This was an important factor too perhaps. I was well-rested. 

In the end, the long sleeve top was almost unnoticeable and maybe it actually helped me stay comfortable and zen.

This is exactly how its supposed to be.

Ever since The uncomfortable steady-state, I've been out more often and its starting to become a lot easier to get comfortable with the runs (as I knew it would).

Yesterday I went for a run and ended up averaging a very good (well, for me at least) run averaging 4:25/km which is a substantial improvement to be performances of late. The run registered quite a high TSS of 122 and so quite a lot more effort according to the stats. Interesting thing is that I started off badly. Within about 2 minutes of the run, I had already an ache in my side - like a cramp which did not bode well however, it slowly withered away which was surprising.

I wouldn't say the run was particularly tough notwithstanding what the statistics say. This must mean I'm improving. I did run with my lighter running shoes which might have made my strides a lot more 'fluid' perhaps. 

I didn't sleep particularly well afterwards and I've been finding that to be the case after my runs recently. A co-founding factor might well be the temperature at night being elevated because of its summer. 

I also ran a bit further than usual, I did an extra half-loop detour which edged my distance up somewhat. I do find that when I do something different like this, something differently occurs! In this case, I'd like to think it contributed to my performance in some transient way.

I've also spent more time being more observant of my surroundings recently. So for instance, I look out into people's yards and notice people looking out the windows etc. Other things catch my attention too, like different coloured pots in things and other things that I'd not really pay much attention to in the past. This might contribute to the effectiveness of the run because mental exercise affects perception and If I'm enjoying something then the physical strain/stress is not as much a singular focus.

I went for a run today. It was a good day for it. The last run I did was at crazy 'o clock in the peak mid-day sun and I paid dearly for it. 

This time it was overcast, kind of cold and asking for a run. I've still had a horrendous blister on my pinky toe from the aforementioned run. After a quick chat with my dad, the conclusion was that it would be smarter to not go for a run, particularly if it was sore.

The thing is, is that it is not sore but it looks really sore. It's basically a blood-blister but now has next to no physical sensation. So it doesn't hurt. With that, I figured I must go for the run. I expected that it would burst and I'd have an icky sock but that's OK - running for me is far better than having an icky sock. 

I went for my run, no drama. Peeled off my sock and by blood-blister looked up at me as if to say, 'missed me?' as it was unaffected by the 11km run. I was pretty impressed. Anyway, so I still have it in its ballooning glory.

The run was fairly good, at times tough but manageable. I ended up posting my 3rd fastest run for 2020 - so the blister actually could have propelled me to success! Unlikely.

I started off pretty easy as usual and felt a little uncomfortable because I think I'm getting a little heavy and the pegasus' isn't light either. I was convinced that my under-pronation would mash up my blister...(and kind of hoping it would)

The run was a progressively tough run. I find that I can usually run hard for most of the run and its just either the feet or the inner thighs that start to fatigue around the end. I'm still pretty cardiovascularly fit and have no problems maintaining my breathing. I'm just sort of lugging around a bigger frame. 

I felt that I was at times moving more fluidly - by that, I mean that I was using my arms and thrusting them down(ok not trusting but moving) and productively contributing to my strides(which is why I want to do it). Basically you feel like you're not fighting with your weight or the landing of your shoes or thinking about the strength you decide to consciously have to use to push off. All that stuff shouldn't be on your mind, it should be sort of, I don't know - just happen.

I think for that to happen you need to calibrate yourself, slow down if you're running too fast, change gears if you need do etc until you're less worried about whatever it is that you're focusing on. Its a complete calibration and it has to happen while your running, like a constant manipulation of what's annoying/hurting you and then deciding what to do about it.

In most cases that means slow down, but other times it could mean speed up so limit the amount of time spent on your feet(or I don't know something that makes it better). I think most people don't act on it - they just keep to the same plan they had then they started the run. Examples include not stopping, maintaining a certain pace/time or something else that predetermined that they just refuse to change even if it would help that recalibration.

Ultimately like life, you're alone - in your head, in your body in your thoughts and even if you're running with someone - everything you feel happens to you, every painful twitch, strained sensation or irritation is something you experience and is something, especially in running that you must come to grips with yourself.

And when you do, its a personal win for your decisions. That's why being involved in your 'ownness' and playing your own manager, race leader, nutritionist, fitness instructor can make you better than anyone else who wants to do it for you. By all means, they can support you, but you need to decide to take the advice, to wake up in the morning, to try out the new regime. You are the thing that will make everything happen.

In many ways that's why I like running because it puts you in touch with yourself and you start doing stuff for yourself, you start listening...calibrating. You act on yourself for yourself. That's an empowering activity. Running is important to me in this way. I do have selfish, self-centred tendencies at times and this is when it's really ok.

For the last few runs, I've started noticing more things and that gets in the way of things should just happen. For instance, I'm noticing my weight, I'm noticing the strain in my inner thighs, I'm noticing the lack of movement throughout my arms...I'm noticing way too damn much stuff.  Its really affecting my zen, man!

One thing I like about running is no matter how fast you are going, you always get to feel a certain feeling, where you're at a comfortable limit that you're willing to not pass because otherwise, you'd have more trouble than you currently have and just being on the current level constantly is tough enough.

I think when I was 25, I had this window, and all the way up till now at 33 - I still feel that window of toughness and its such an honest measurement of effort that you need to contend with while you're running.

I think that it will always be there irrespective of your age. For me, that window or phase you get when you're running is like a high - an uncomfortable high which rewards you mentally while you're there fighting with it. It validates your effort and tells you that your time there is worth it. If you didn't have that feeling at that stage, you're wasting your time - you could be doing something else more productive. 

In a way, I think I aim for that uncomfortable steady-state because you are able to stay there but it's just a matter of maintaining effort but its totally doable. It's about the place where if you do any more, you're might fall off!

For a professional athlete, this mindset wouldn't work but maybe it would just for a while until they train to get over it. I'm not training to get over it. Some people train like athletes and have this mindset - it's not really maintainable in the long term. You want to be able to have it when you're running at 70.

Ultimately if I'm doing it right, I'm maintaining that uncomfortable steady state until the run is done. That is a good run.

I don't care too much about measurements because, as I said, I think the measurement will vary over time but you'll always be able to reach this window of productivity albeit perhaps at different measurements/metrics than before. So in that way metrics aren't useful but feel is.

Besides, I don't know when I'm running 4"30(and I really don't want to be paying attention to that) but I know when I'm in that uncomfortable steady-state.

I guess that's my point - running is a privilege and its to be eternally grateful that you can always reach for that steady-state irrespective of your age. I'm always grateful that I can physically go for a run, I'm not sick, or disabled and it's just a matter of wanting to do it. That in itself is a freedom.

The best things in life are free.