Had the strangest enlightening thought today. I was sitting in the pub, after work having a beer and I must have just sat down and just then, it hit me - Me in a pub? What am I doing? I don't drink. Why am I here? What has taken me to this point?

So my dissection begins,

I soon realised, part into my 1st beer, that this organised "work drinks" that I found myself at was shiat. Maybe it was because I'm such a loser and I don't have any friends that I soon became irritated by the conversation. But either way I found myself sitting there not really wanting to talk to people about the weather, the stupid episode on TV or how great this new organisational process is for submitting holiday requests forms are, or for that matter what you do, what you don't like and what irritates you.

Somehow, It was like I had gracefully displaced myself from my office chair to the pub - A social nirvana apparently - where you make friends, have fun and enjoy the greatness of your youth, job, life whatever. That doesn't happen at work drinks...you get bored, plain and simple.

It was like herding a group of sheep into a pub, giving them clown outfits and waiting rather desperately for them to do something socially spectacular *for* the company. I'm no sheep, no clown either - Mind you, this lighter thought nearly had me breaking into a breakdance routine but thankfully that soon passed. So I'm not going to do that.

I wondered back a few times to the last few drinks I've attended and tried to list what benefits I gained from each outing and it was sobering that I couldn't think of any. What have I done with my time? What has the 7 beers got me?

And I realised. Im a stat. I'm a stat of people going to the pub, a stat of the group from work wanting to be there, a stat of people trying to do the right thing. a stat, a stat a stat.

Im not a stat.

I want to be the guy who's enjoying his life, every moment, Work drinks like this is the best way for no one really to take responsibility for wasting your time. My time is precious.


I don't really want to be here.

Why am I here?

I'm not.